It was a pleasure to have my friend Dean Palmer in service on Tuesday night. He spoke on being relationally fit and used the word “respect” to teach us about healthy relationships.
Please keep in mind the following notes are not exactly what he said but what I heard and what resonated with me to help me be more relationally fit.
Love is respectful.
Dean started by encouraging us to always work to improve in this area. He said God’s not in a hurry with what he teaches because he is always working on us.
Healthy relationships are built on the foundation of mutual respect. This respect is an essential aspect of love.
“[Love] doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil…” —1 Corinthians 13:5
It’s also commanded of all of us in God’s word.
“Honour all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honour the king.” —1 Peter 2:17
We are called by God to respect others, and this is so because it opens the door to building relationships. But what is respect?
respect: showing value and honor to others by your actions
Signs of respect:
- Do I matter to you?
- Do I have worth?
- Do you care about me?
- Do you show me you care not just through your words, but through your actions?
- Do people feel better or worse after being with you?
- Are they encouraged by you?
Jesus was the ultimate example of how to show respect to others, including those who usually aren’t shown respect. He even showed respect to his accusers at his unjust criminal trial (Luke 7:36-48).
If we’re going to be relationally fit, we must learn to be respectful. Here are four big ways to treat others with respect.
1. Stop talking and listen.
Jesus had a tendency to notice people no one else did, and to show positive attention to those who were usually ignored or hated. We should do the same.
“And his inward affection is more abundant toward you, whilst he remembereth the obedience of you all, how with fear and trembling ye received him.” —2 Corinthians 7:15
Are you a good listener? When we see someone who needs to be heard, we need to treat it like a stop sign. Rolling through a stop sign is selfish and shows that we’re in too much of a hurry. In the same way, when we ignore those we’re meant to minister to, we are putting too much focus on ourselves rather than on others.
2. Keep your promises.
“Whoso boasteth himself of a false gift is like clouds and wind without rain.” —Proverbs 25:14
We all know how bad it feels to trust someone and be let down by them. Do we want to make others feel that way? Of course not!
Promises are important to each of us. They’re a way of showing trustworthiness and respect. God always keeps his promises. We should be the same way.
3. Yield your rights and serve others.
“And I will very gladly spend and be spent for you; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I be loved.” —2 Corinthians 12:15
Jesus came not to be served, but to serve. He showed us what a servant’s heart is like. He put away his rights as God and instead chose to serve us. And we are to follow his example.
We can’t build our lives on our own self-interest, but on our willingness to follow Christ. God deserves our best. Does our offering and service for God show others the respect we’re called to give them?
4. Slow down and take time to see others the way God does.
“Be of the same mind one toward another. Mind not high things, but condescend to men of low estate. Be not wise in your own conceits.” —Romans 12:16
“With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love…” —Ephesians 4:2
Jesus noticed the unnoticeable. He showed respect to those who had never received it before. In doing so, he changed their lives, and he showed us what true respect is all about.
God loves everyone. Each of us is precious in his sight. When we choose to see things the way he sees them, how could we not respect our fellow human beings made in the image of God?
Respect is an essential element of healthy relationships. Are the relationships in your life where you want them to be? If not, maybe it’s time to look at the way you’re treating others. A little respect can go a long way towards becoming relationally fit!
Thanks for reading! Be sure to check out my notes on all the other revival services. And if you haven’t, subscribe to my newsletter to get all the latest content straight to your inbox.
To your fitness!